February 2nd, 2006

tank girl



My getting-a-job-anxiety has replaced my have-a-bunch-of-schoolwork-anxiety that I used to have all the time when I had school. The damn thing gets in the way of my creativity as I feel so self-conscious about doing stuff I actually want to do when I have other stuff I have to do!

Seriously, I can't do fun stuff when I have something I really have to do that I postpone. I think about it in the back of my head all the time while having constant anxiety, it's horrible.

The worst thing is that I'm so used to it after years of school that I can actually live with it. I can keep on procrastinating, feeling terrible, doing nothing creative while having anxiety over that and the fact that I'm wasting my life.

All i can do is whine over my situation in pointless blog entries instead of making one simple phone call and ask for a job. I am aware of why I have anxiety, and yet I do nothing.

Man, I suck.
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